From Jackass to Tantra

Movement first interested me as something wonderfully unpredictable. The irreverence of Jackass, the physical intelligence of skateboarding and the environmental puzzles of parkour shared a quality: you found out what was possible by trying. Sometimes you fell. Sometimes you laughed. You learnt from the floor, from fear and from each other.

Yoga introduced another register of attention. Breath and observation could change the experience of a familiar movement. Different forms of martial arts and somatic play made contact a conversation: another person can resist, agree, change direction or stop. No two encounters are identical.

DJing and Open Dance brought these questions into music. A sound can be familiar, strange, tender or irritating. In darkness, without a choreography to follow, we can notice the responses that arrive before we have words for them. Stillness is also a choice.

Later, intimacy and relationship work widened the field of practice. The encounter is no longer only physical. There may be attraction, uncertainty, shame, desire or conflict. What happens between sensation and reaction? Can we remain curious without overruling another person’s boundaries?

Some contemporary Western intimacy workshops use the language of neo-tantra. They have been one influence on my personal journey, but they are not equivalent to the diverse historical Hindu and Buddhist tantric traditions. I do not speak for those lineages, nor describe myself as their master.

I call this an inquiry rather than a method. The movement from impact toward intimacy describes aspects of my life, not a compulsory evolution from crude to refined, body to spirit, or beginner to expert. Each practice can return us to an ordinary, difficult, beautiful question: what is happening now?

There is no finish line in movement or mastery. There is the possibility of noticing, choosing and beginning again.